He exists

Tonight I got the answer to the question I have been asking my whole life. Does God exist? Well, tonight I realized that yes, he does.

Only someone with infinite wisdom like God could give us the baked potato. Hot and covered in butter, bacon, and chives. Every bite is a blessing. When a potato is baked, an angel sings.

God has also given us the King Crab, whose legs will cure any ills you have. Crack them open, dip the meat in butter sauce and you will see His face, and then you will feel at peace and nothing in the world, good or bad, will matter.

You can find no better proof of his love then his finest creation, the biggest gift of all. The ever giving cow. From the cow we get the food that God himself eats every night. Steak. In Heaven, every meal is steak. And crab. And the potato.

So yeah I went to Outback tonight and had this for dinner, and it was good. Very good.


And no, I really don't think I can believe in God. Just had to make that clear in case anyone started to wonder about me.